Book Review
A short overview of this book
Tell Me About Sex, Grandma! By Anastasia Higginbotham is a book that will help parents to start conversations about the fact that sex is not just about making babies.
There are lots of books that explain sex to children, but most talk about baby-making sex ie how babies are made. This book is different because it provides a fuller description of sex, and focuses on the dynamics of sex instead of the mechanics.
The book starts off with a young child asking grandma about sex.
Grandma starts off by explaining that is okay to be curious about sex. This is important as it lets them know that it is okay to ask you questions. The child wonders what it is (and isn’t), why sex is bad, not spoken about and a secret.
Grandma explains that it is a grown-up thing. This is important as kids do need to be reminded that sex is just for grown-ups. Sex is also private which means it shouldn’t be seen or shown.
The author describes it as a thing you do with your body, moving it with someone (or by yourself ie masturbation) to feel good. And that we know how to do the moving because our feelings tell us what to do. The child asks if sex always makes a baby, which it doesn’t. The author explains that as you grow up, your feelings grow up too, which means you discover what sexuality means for you and who you will like.
Consent is talked about, in that you choose whether you want to, and the same for the person that you might be with. The child asks why grown-ups don’t want kids to know about sex, and the authors says that we want to protect children from growing up too fast. The message is shared that adults should not have sex with children (you could also add in that children should not have sex with children too).
You could also use this book to start a conversation about porn, by telling your child that porn isn’t the best way to learn about sex. In the first few pages of this book, the child turns to the internet to ask about sex.
I really like this book, and I think it is a book that parents should have on their bookshelf, as it provides you with the opportunity to talk about the wider meaning of sex.
Ideal Age
Ideal for children aged 6 to 11 years.
Buy this book
✅ Buy a copy of Tell Me About Sex, Grandma! By Anastasia Higginbotham from Amazon.
Video Transcription
A transcription in case you are more of a reader than a listener
Hey there! I’m Cath Hak, and I run Sex Ed Rescue, where I review books and help parents feel more comfortable talking to their kids about sex education. If you check out the link below, you’ll find my website and information about my boot camp. The boot camp is a five-day program that gives you all the info you need to understand what sex education is all about. It’s important to have a good understanding before diving into these conversations.
Now, let’s talk about a book called Tell Me About Sex Grandma by Anastasia Higgin, Gotham. It was published in 2017 by Feminist Press. I know the title might sound a bit off-putting, with the words ordinary, terrible things underneath, but don’t worry, it’s not as negative as it seems.
Anastasia Higgin also writes books on other important topics like skin color, death, and divorce. She’s like the Beth Cole of tackling subjects that adults struggle with and others don’t want to write about.
Overall, I think Tell Me About Sex Grandma is a pretty good book. As a sexologist and sex educator, I have a few minor issues with it from a clinical sex therapy perspective, but for the most part, it’s a great resource. There are plenty of books out there that explain how babies are made, but this one goes beyond that. It helps kids understand that sex isn’t just about reproduction, but also about pleasure, consent, and the different meanings of sex.
There are a couple of other authors I want to mention. Corey Silverberg has written books like What Makes a Baby and Sex Is a Funny Word. His upcoming book on sex is similar to Tell Me About Sex Grandma in terms of being politically correct and open. It’s always good to have different resources to choose from.
Now, let’s dive into the book itself. It’s not the easiest book to read aloud, but it’s worth it. I’ve read it with my twelve-year-old and my nine to ten-year-old, and it sparked some great conversations. It’s not a book where all the information is laid out on the pages. It’s more like a conversation starter.
The book touches on the fact that sex is everywhere in our society. We see sexualized images in shopping centers and encounter sexual content on YouTube. It’s important to talk to our kids about these things and help them navigate the world around them.
One thing to note is that this book is a bit pricey compared to others, but I believe it’s worth the investment. It’s the kind of book that should be on every parent’s shelf.
As you go through the book, it’s important to engage your child in conversation. Ask them questions, like what they think certain things mean or how they feel about certain topics. This book is a tool to start meaningful discussions.
The book covers various aspects of sex, including feelings, choices, and safety. It emphasizes that no one should ever force or take sex from you without your consent. It’s crucial to teach our kids about boundaries and consent from an early age.
While the book is great, there are a few things I wish it included. It doesn’t touch on topics like sexual assault, rape, or prostitution. These are important conversations to have with our kids, and you can add them in when reading the book.
Overall, Tell Me About Sex Grandma is not perfect, but no book is. It’s a valuable resource for starting conversations with your child about sex and its different meanings. I personally bought a copy and recommend it to other parents. I hope this review helps you decide if it’s the right book for your family.
Cheers!
