cover of The secret business of relationships love and sex book

Secret Business of Relationships, Love and Sex: Book Review

Book Review: A book that makes an ideal ‘first book’ about sex for tweens and young teens.

Introduction

A short overview of this book

The Secret Business of Relationships, Love and Sex by Heather Anderson, Fay Angelo and Rose Stewart is what I would call a ‘first book’ for tweens and teens on how to have respectful relationships. It talks about sex but it also talks about all the other parts that make up healthy and safe relationships.

✅ Buy a copy of The Secret Business of Relationships, Love and Sex by Heather Anderson, Fay Angelo and Rose Stewart from  Book Depository.

Book Review

An overview of the book

This book was first published in 2015, so it is very recent and relevant in regards to the new risks that teens face. In our day, it was HIV or AIDS, STIs (sexually transmitted infections), alcohol and unplanned pregnancy. Today we can add in a few new risks such as drugs, online porn, sexting, bullying and the online world.

The authors come from a very hands-on background. Fay comes from a teaching background, Heather is a Sexual Health Nurse/ Sex Educator and Rose is a teacher and School Psychologist. So they are dealing with this tweens & teens and sex every day.

The authors have 3 earlier books. One for boys, Secret Boy’s Business, and one for younger girls, Secret Girl’s Business. They have then published More Secret Girls’ Business which is for older girls.

These earlier books mainly focus on puberty and are gender-specific. What I love about them is that they don’t talk about sex within these books. A lot of puberty books talk about everything, trying to squeeze all the information that a child could possibly want to know, into the one book. This is great in theory, as you only have to buy the one book. In reality, though, this is problematic as it includes information that most kids just aren’t ready for. So it is good to have all the sexual content that tweens and teens need to know about added into another book, like The Secret Business of Relationships, Love and Sex.

So giving a book to an 11 year old that talks about oral sex, or anal sex or orgies and stuff just isn’t appropriate because they’re just not interested in that stuff (yet). If anything, it is going to scare them and give them the wrong messages about sex. So you want to sort of hold off with giving them too much detail and information about sex until they are a little bit older.

Once kids start to progress through puberty and the sex hormones have started to kick in all, it is only then, that they then begin to show an interest in sex. It is only now, that they finally start to see sex as something that they may actually want to do (whereas before they just saw it as textbook material/behaviour). And this happens because of the sex hormones that change the way that we think and feel about sex.

So what’s inside this book?

The Secret Business of Relationships, Love and Sex is much bigger than the earlier puberty books with about 130 pages What I love about these books is that it is not like reading a novel which is all words. Give a novel to a 12 year old with all small words and they most probably won’t read it. This book is different in that it has lots of images, and the words are broken up into readable sections very nicely. And despite the sexual content (eg masturbation), the images are not explicit or offensive (or scary!).

The book, The Secret Business of Relationships, Love and Sex, covers a lot of territory! In regards to relationships, it talks about what makes up a healthy friendship, romantic feelings, sexual diversity, gender identity, emotional and physical safety.

The Secret Business of Relationships, Love and Sex also talks about:

  • Conception, pregnancy and birth.
  • Sexual decision-making.
  • Contraception
  • Unplanned pregnancy.
  • Sexually transmitted infections.
  • Consent, sex and the law.

I think that The Secret Business of Relationships, Love and Sex is ideal as a first sex book that kids should have because it isn’t a sex manual, like many other books for teens. As a parent, we are often reluctant to provide our kids with too much information about sex. I see this book as a halfway point as it talks about the important stuff but it doesn’t provide them with information about everything to do with sex! They can read those books when they are 14 or 15 or 16 (depending on their maturity and level of interest).

I think that The Secret Business of Relationships, Love and Sex is a great book, a book that all tweens and early teens should have. It is a good first book on sex for this age group as it provides the information in a very age-appropriate and non-judgemental way.

✅ Buy a copy of The Secret Business of Relationships, Love and Sex by Heather Anderson, Fay Angelo and Rose Stewart from  Book Depository.

Ideal ages

What’s the ideal age for this book?

The Secret Business of Relationships, Love and Sex is ideal for children between the ages of 12 – 14 years of age.

✅ Buy a copy

Where can you buy a copy of this book?

Affiliate Disclosure: As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. You may also find other affiliate links. You can read my full disclosure here.

You can buy a copy of The Secret Business of Relationships, Love and Sex by Heather Anderson, Fay Angelo and Rose Stewart from  Book Depository.

You can find more books like this in my extensive list of Sex Education Books for Children.

Video review

Have a look through the book

1 thought on “Secret Business of Relationships, Love and Sex: Book Review”

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    Secret relationships can be sexy and intense, but at the same time they may have their own drawbacks I was in a long distance relationship with a guy for 1 year and we broke and later i started dating another guy which was again a long distance relationship and my ex started getting in touch with me. So initially i was not able to gauge what were his intentions so I talked with him like normal friends and this I did not tell to my boyfriend. And I think my previous relationship was better and I am ending this relationship. I am so confused if I am comparing him with this present boyfriend.

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