Book Review
A short overview of this book
You Ruined It by Anastacia HigginBotham is an invaluable resource for talking to children about sexual assault (or abuse). It sheds light on the confusion and pain that many children feel in the aftermath of incest and sexual assault.
This is a resource that parents may find helpful in reading to a child that has been assaulted (or abused) and/or to siblings in the family.
You can learn more on this page, about how to talk to kids about sex education.
Ideal Age
Ideal for children aged 8 to 12 years.
Buy this book
✅ Buy a copy of You Ruined It by Anastacia HigginBotham from Amazon.
Video Transcription
A transcription in case you are more of a reader than a listener
Hey there! I’m Cath Hakanson, and welcome to Sex Ed Rescue. My website is all about helping parents have those important conversations with their kids about love, sex, and relationships. Lately, I’ve been getting a lot of messages from parents asking for guidance on talking about sexual abuse. That’s why I want to tell you about a book called Ruined by Anastasia Higginbottom.
Anastasia is a bit like the Bet Cole of writing books on topics that no one else covers. Unlike Bet Cole, she doesn’t use humor, but instead provides straightforward facts. The book is beautifully designed and tackles a difficult subject. It’s about a child who has a close relationship with their cousin, but unfortunately, their cousin betrays their trust by engaging in sexual abuse.
The book explores how the child tells their parents, the reactions of the family, and the child’s own emotions, like feeling torn because their cousin was their favorite person in the world. It also delves into the challenging process of disclosing the abuse to other family members who may not want to believe it. Sadly, this is something I hear about all too often.
But the book doesn’t stop there. It also takes us on a journey of healing, as the child and their mother work together to break the cycle of trauma and abuse. It’s empowering to see the steps they take to heal and move forward. I want to show you some of the pages inside because the artwork and layout are really well done.
Now, let’s talk about who would benefit from reading this book. It’s important to note that this book is specifically for children who have experienced abuse themselves. It’s not a book to simply teach kids about sexual abuse. If your child has been abused, this book can be a helpful resource, but I strongly recommend involving a therapist to ensure they are ready for it.
There’s another angle to consider too. This book could also be used to explain to children why they can no longer spend time with someone who has abused them, like a cousin or a friend. As a parent, it’s crucial to keep our kids safe, and this book can help facilitate that conversation.
I want to be transparent with you though. This book covers a lot of intense emotions, and it can be triggering. So, take breaks if you need to and come back to it when you’re ready. But overall, I believe it has the potential to be a valuable resource for parents navigating conversations about sexual abuse. It can even be used to address child-to-child abuse situations, which unfortunately are becoming more common.
So, all in all, I think Ruined is a book that could make a real difference for many parents. Give it a read, but remember to take care of yourself too. Cheers!
